Ralph Waldo Emerson Essay Essay Example for Free

Ralph Waldo Emerson Essay Essay Ralph Waldo Emerson’s theory of individualism is a stance that emphasizes the importance of self-reliance for personal success. One of the main tenets of the theory claims that a genius is someone who perseveres with one’s plans regardless of others’ opinions and that nothing is sacred other than the integrity of one’s own mind. This essay will further discuss this tenet to support Emerson’s Individualism. People should live their lives without being burdened by the opinions of others. Emerson, in reference to babes, writes â€Å"their mind being whole, their eye is as yet unconquered nfancy conforms to nobody; all conform to it. † All of the greatest inventions came about from someone who did not conform to society. Society ends up conforming to those who follow their own dreams, as adults conform to the ways a child acts. In todays society, success is often measured by a person’s wealth, status and fame. However, no one should judge what success and failure is aside from the person it concerns. Very often society looks down on those who do not conform to its rigid structure. If a person does what everyone else is doing, who will innovate? Unsurprisingly, all those considered successful were those who broke out of the mold and followed their own vision. A genius is someone who perseveres with his or her plans regardless of the negativity around them. Thomas Edison’s teacher said that he was too stupid to learn anything. Although the number of attempts varies, there is a consensus that the lowest number of times Edison failed to create the light bulb was around 1,000. When asked how he felt about failing so much, Edison answered, â€Å"I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps. † Emerson writes â€Å"God will not have his work made manifest by cowards. † Whether or not a person is religious, the meaning holds true. No coward has ever been able to achieve anything great because cowards tend to give up easily. Another one of Edison’s famous quotes states, â€Å"genius is 1% inspiration, 99% perspiration. † This claim supports Emerson’s Individualism because it takes a genius to perspire and work through the numerous obstacles that stand between him or her and success. Everything can be broken and worked around other than what a person truly believes. Emersons theory argues that if a person were to betray his or her own belief, it could be damaging beyond repair. Emerson states, â€Å" if I’m the devil then I shall be the devil,† suggesting only a person’s mind can truly decide what is moral and what is immoral. Emerson also writes, â€Å"to believe your own thought, to believe what is true for you in your private heart is true for all men,-that is genius. This is how revolutions happen, when a large group of people decides that the laws are no longer right. No law, no life, is greater than a person’s own beliefs because Emerson states, â€Å"nothing is sacred other than the integrity of your own mind. † A successful person is often, if not always, fully dedicated to what they believe in because a person will never give up on something they believe to be truly right. Emerson’s theory of Individualism doesn’t encourage selfishness because that would be a moral judgment. The theory does not make any statements of morality. It claims that a person should rely only on himself or herself to make decisions and to define what they believe to be right and wrong. Outside forces should not be relied on or even considered when trying to achieve personal goals. If a person believes that failures are actually successes because they bring them one step closer to the final goal, failure does not exist. Success and happiness will come to a person as long as he or she relies on his or her own judgment, perseveres regardless of the negativity of external influences, and stays true to their minds without breaking their integrity.

Complexometric Determination of Water Hardness Essay Example for Free

Complexometric Determination of Water Hardness Essay When a polyatomic ligand with multiple lone pairs of electrons available for bonding to a central metal ion forms a complex with a metal ion, a process known as chelation takes place. Metal ion impurities can be found by using disodium salt of EDTA to determine the concentration of M2+ by complexometric or chelometric titration. Erichrome Black T makes it easy to see when the EDTA has completely chelated the metal impurities. When the metal cation is still present in the water, the solution will be a complex with a pink tint. Once enough EDTA has been added to the M2+ solution the metal ions complex to the EDTA leaving the indicator solvated causing a color change from pink to blue. Once the color has changed to blue, the titration has reached an end point and the M2+ metal ion impurities in hard water can be calculated. Procedure: Prepare 500 mL of 0.004 M disodium EDTA solution by dissolving 0.7-0.8g of Na2EDTA in 500 mL deionized water. Standardize the solution by using a 10 mL transfer pipet to add 10 mL of standardized calcium ion stock solution to a 250 mL Erlenmeyer flask and mixing it with 30 mL of deionized water. Add 3 mL of ammonia/ammonium chloride buffer (pH 10) to ensure that the calcium ions remain in the solution for accurate results. Add four drops of Eriochrome Black T indicator solution so that a color change can be visible during titration. Once the solution is prepared, titrate it with the disodium EDTA solution. Add the solution quickly at first and once the color changes from pink to violet slow down the titration until the color changes from violet to blue. Then record the results. Part 2 Unknown After receiving an unknown prepared water sample record the unknown in your lab notebook (unknown #76). After the unknown has been recorded, transfer 25 mL of the sample into a 250 mL Erlenmeyer flask with 20 mL of DI water. As in part one, add 3 mL of ammonia/ammonium chloride buffer (pH10) to the solution along with four drops of Erichrome Black T indicator. Once the solution has been made, titrate the solution with the standardized disodium EDTA solution and calculate the hardness of the prepared water sample from the titration. Compare the results to the expected range for municipal water hardness on your city’s water quality lab website. Data: | Test 1: Standardization of EDTA Mass of CaCO3: 0.01 g Moles of CaCO3: 9.910^-5 Molarity of the 250 mL standard Ca2+: 3.9610^-4 M Column1| Trial 1| Trial 2| Trial 3| Volume of Ca2 Titrated (mL)| 10| 10| 10| Moles Ca2+ Titrated | 9.910^-5| 9.910^-5| 9.910^-5| Moles EDTA| 9.910^-5| 9.910^-5| 9.910^-5| Initial Buret reading (mL)| 1| 1| 1| Final buret reading (mL)| 26.3| 26.5| 27| Volume of EDTA (mL)| 25.3| 25.5| 26| Molarity of EDTA (M)| 0.0039| 0.0039| 0.0038| Average Molarity of EDTA| | 0.0039 M| | Test 2: Unknown Determination Sample #76 Column1| Trial 1| Trial 2| Trial 3| Volume of Water Sample Used (mL)| 25| 25| 25| Initial buret reading (mL)| 1| 1| 1| Final buret reading (mL)| 14.8| 15| 14.9| Volume of EDTA used (mL)| 13.8| 14| 13.9| Moles EDTA| 5.3810^-5| 5.4610^-5| 5.4210^-5| Moles Ca2+ in sample| 5.3810^-5| 5.3810^-5| 5.3810^-5| Moles Ca2+ per liter| 5.3810^-4| 5.3810^-4| 5.3810^-4| Grams CaCO3 per liter| 0.054| 0.055| 0.055| Water hardness| 29.73| 30.61| 30.17| Average water hardness (ppm CaCO3)| | 30.17| | | | | | | | | | | | | | Calculations: Test 1: Calculate Mass of CaCO3 used in the reaction: 10 mL Ca2x 1L/1000mLx 1g/1L= 0.01 g CaCO3 Calculate Moles of CaCO3 0.01 g CaCO3x 1mole CaCO3/100.1 g CaCO3= 9.910^-5 moles CaCO3 Molarity of 250 mL of standard Ca2+ solution 9.910^-5 moles CaCO3/0.250 L= 3.9610^-4 M Ca2+ Moles Moles of EDTA Moles of EDTA=Moles CaCO3, 1 to 1 ratio. Molarity of EDTA Trial 1 (10 mL CaCO3 sol/25.6 mL EDTA @ end point)x (1L CaCO3 Sol/1000mL CaCO3 sol)x(1 g CaCO3/1 L sol)x(1 mole CaCO3/100.1g CaCO3)x(1 mole EDTA/1 mole CaCO3)x(1000 mL EDTA sol/1 L EDTA sol) = 0.0039 M Trial 2 (10 mL CaCO3 sol/25.5 mL EDTA @ end point)x (1L CaCO3 Sol/1000mL CaCO3 sol)x(1 g CaCO3/1 L sol)x(1 mole CaCO3/100.1g CaCO3)x(1 mole EDTA/1 mole CaCO3)x(1000 mL EDTA sol/1 L EDTA sol) =0.0039 M Trial 3 (10 mL CaCO3 sol/26 mL EDTA @ end point)x (1L CaCO3 Sol/1000mL CaCO3 sol)x(1 g CaCO3/1 L sol)x(1 mole CaCO3/100.1g CaCO3)x(1 mole EDTA/1 mole CaCO3)x(1000 mL EDTA sol/1 L EDTA sol) =0.0038 M Average Molarity (0.0039 M+0.0039 M+0.0039 M)/3=0.0039 M Test 2: Calculate moles of EDTA Trial 1 0.0138 L EDTA(3.910^-3 moles EDTA)= 5.8310^-5 Moles EDTA Trial 2 0.014 L EDTA(3.910^-3 moles EDTA)= 5.4610^-5 Moles EDTA Trial 3 0.0139 L EDTA(3.910^-3 moles EDTA)= 5.4210^-5 Moles EDTA Moles Ca2+ Moles of Ca2+ equals moles of EDTA Moles of CA2+ per liter Moles Ca2+ x 10 to get Moles per leter Trial 1 5.8310^-5 Moles EDTA(10)= 5.3810^-4 Moles Ca2+ per Liter Trial 2 5.4610^-5 Moles EDTA(10)= 5.4610^-4 Moles Ca2+ per Liter Trial 3 5.4210^-5 Moles EDTA(10)= 5.4210^-4 Moles Ca2+ per Liter Grams CaCO3 per liter Calculate by multiplying moles of Ca2+ by grams per mole of Ca2+ Trial 1 (5.3810^-4 Moles Ca2+/ 1L)(101.1g/1mole)= 0.054g/L CaCO3 Trial 2 (5.4610^-4 Moles Ca2+ /1L) (101.1g/1mole)= 0.055g/L CaCO3 Trial 3 (5.4210^-4 Moles Ca2+ /1L) (101.1g/1mole)= 0.055g/L CaCO3 Water Hardness Trial 1 (13.8 mL EDTA/25 mL sample)(1 L EDTA sol/1000 mL EDTA)(5.3810^-4 mol EDTA/1L EDTA)(1 mol CaCO3/1 mol EDTA)(100.1g CaCO3/1 mol CaCO3)(1000mg CaCO3/1g CaCO3)(1000mL Sample sol/1L sample sol)= 29.73 ppm CaCO3 Trial 2 (14 mL EDTA/25 mL sample)(1 L EDTA sol/1000 mL EDTA)(5.4610^-4 mol EDTA/1L EDTA)(1 mol CaCO3/1 mol EDTA)(100.1g CaCO3/1 mol CaCO3)(1000mg CaCO3/1g CaCO3)(1000mL Sample sol/1L sample sol)= 30.61 ppm CaCO3 Trial 3 (13.9 mL EDTA/25 mL sample)(1 L EDTA sol/1000 mL EDTA)(5.4210^-4 mol EDTA/1L EDTA)(1 mol CaCO3/1 mol EDTA)(100.1g CaCO3/1 mol CaCO3)(1000mg CaCO3/1g CaCO3)(1000mL Sample sol/1L sample sol)= 30.17 ppm CaCO3 Average water hardness (29.73+30.61+30.17)/3= 30.17 ppm CaCO3 Conclusion: The water hardness of a known and unknown sample solution has been determined by means of titration with disodium salt of EDTA to calculate the concentration of M2+ metal ion impurities in hard water in a process known as chelation. After running tests and calculating the water hardness in an unknown sample it was found that there was 30.17 ppm CaCO3 in the sample.

Freuds Cases of Hysteria: Birth of Psychoanalysis

Freuds Cases of Hysteria: Birth of Psychoanalysis Abstract This thesis returns to the original case histories that Freud wrote on the patients he treated for hysteria. Here in these early works, the beginnings of psychoanalytical theory take shape in the acceptance of purely psychological theories of hysteria. Catharsis leads to the first inklings of repression which requires the use of free association, which again leads into Freuds attempt to explain the strange neuroses he sees through seduction theory, which is again transformed as his thinking moves on. Through Anna O, Frau Emmy von N. and Dora, Freud discovered the seeds of what would become his all-encompassing theory of the human psyche. Modern reinterpretations (e.g. Rosenbaum Muroff, 1984) of those early cases that form the basis of modern psychoanalysis have come and gone, but the original texts remain as historical testament to the fermenting of those fundamental ideas. Introduction Hysteria has been a hugely popular subject for research in psychoanalysis and in the history of ideas. Its roots are clearly signalled by the Greek word from which the word comes: uterus. Indeed the uterus was seen by Egyptians as a mobile organism that could move about of its own will when it chose to do so this caused the disturbances only seen (or acknowledged) in women. Treatments for this disease included trying to entice the uterus back into the body with the use of attractive-smelling substances as well as the driving down of the uterus from above by the eating of noxious substances. Just under four thousand years later, the formulation and treatment of hysterics had barely improved. The history of hysteria shows how it has often been seen as a physical disorder, rather than a mental one. Borossa (2001) describes some of the most common symptoms of hysteria as involving paralysis of the limbs, coughing, fainting, the loss of speech and parallel to this the sudden proficiency in another language. The change of viewpoint that lead up to Freuds analysis was slow in coming, and, as Bernheimer (1985) describes, only showed the first signs of changing in the seventeenth century with the first questions being raised that perhaps hysteria had its origins in a mental disturbance of some kind. Antecedent to Freuds interest in hysteria, it was the clinical neurologist, Charcot, who had a great influence on the field and accepted, by his methods, a more psychological explanation. Although sexual factors had long been implicated in the aetiology of hysteria (Ellenberger, 1970), Charcot did not agree that they were a sine qua non although he did maintain that they played an important part. He treated patients using a form of hypnosis and eventually his formulation of how hysteria was produced and treated was closely intertwined with the hypnosis itself. It was this use of hypnosis that interested Freud and it was the implication of sexual factors in hysteria that was eventually to become influential. It seemed that hysteria and hypnosis might offer Freud the chance to investigate the link between mind and body (Schoenwald, 1956). Anna O: The First Psychoanalytical Patient The literature often describes Anna O as the first ever patient of psychoanalysis. As it is notoriously difficult to define precisely what psychoanalysis might mean because of its shifting nature through time, this is a claim that is clearly interpretational. Still, the fact that this claim is made raises the interest into precisely what it was that marked out Anna Os treatment and the theories accompanying it from what had gone before. Although Anna O was not a patient of Freud, but a patient of his close colleague at the time, Joseph Breuer, he took a great interest in her case and its treatment, and from it flowed some of the foundational aspects of psychoanalysis both through the analysis of this case and Freuds reaction and reinterpretation of it. One of the reasons that Freud was interested in Anna O was that she represented an extremely unusual case of hysteria. Anna O had first been taken ill while she had been taking care of her dying father. At first she suffered from a harsh cough which soon expanded into a range of other perplexing symptoms. Freud Breuer (1991) describe these symptoms as going through four separate stages. The first stage, the latent incubation, occurred while she was nursing her dying father she had become weak, was not eating and would spend much of the afternoons sleeping, which was then unexpectedly followed by a period of excited activity in the evenings. The second stage, which had begun around the time Breuer started treating her, contained a strange confluence of symptoms. Her vision was affected by a squint, she could no longer move any of the extremities on the right side of her body. The third stage, which roughly coincided with the death of her father, heralded alternating states of somnam bulism with relative normality. The fourth stage, according to Breuer, is the slow leaking away of these symptoms up until June 1882, almost two years after she had first come to see her physician. The question is, how had these symptoms been interpreted and what had Breuer done in claiming to effect a cure? It is in the case of Anna O that the most basic elements of a new talking cure can be seen. As told by Breuer, it is a treatment that grew organically, as if by its own power, as he continued to see the patient. Often, in the afternoons, when the patient would habitually fall into an auto-hypnotic state, she would utter odd words or phrases, which, when questioned by those around her, would become elaborated into stories, sometimes taking the form of fairytales. These stories told to Breuer, changed in character over the period of Anna Os treatment, moving from those that were light and poetic, through to those that contained dark and frightening imagery. The unusual thing about these stories was that after they were told, it was as though a demon had been released from the patient and she became calmer and open to reason, cheerful even, often for a period of twenty-four hours afterwards. There seemed to be, staring Breuer in the face, some kind of connection between the stories that Anna O told him and the symptoms which she was manifesting. It was here that Freud was to find the roots of a purely psychological explanation of hysteria. Breuer describes numerous examples of this connection. On one occasion Anna O appeared to be suffering from an uncontrollable thirst and was given to demanding water, although when it was brought, she would refuse to touch it. After six weeks of this continuing, one day, again in an auto-hypnotic state, she started to tell a story about a friend who had allowed her dog to drink out of a glass. This had apparently caused the patient considerable distress and seemed to have led to pent-up anger, which was expressed on this occasion to Breuer. Afterwards Breuer was surprised to find that her previous craving and then abhorrence of water had disappeared. Other similar connections between symptoms and a story told by the patient were also s een by Breuer so that eventually he came up with the theory that the patient could be cured systematically by going through the symptoms to find the event that had caused their onset. Once the event had been described, as long as it was with sufficient emotional vigour, the patient would show remission of that symptom. It was by this method that Breuer claimed to have effected a cure of Anna O over the period of the treatment. It is from this case, although not in the immediate reporting by Breuer, that some of the most fundamental principles of psychoanalysis begin to form. An element of the story that has now passed into psychoanalytic legend, with some accepting its truth while others rejecting it, provides a more dramatic ending to the therapeutic relationship than that presented by Breuer. According to Freud (1970) in his letters, he pieced together an alternative account of what had happened at the end of Anna Os therapy. According to Freud, Breuer had been treating Anna O in the way he had discovered, as previously described, and had finally reached the point where her symptoms had been removed. Later that day he was called back to his patient to find her in considerable apparent pain in her abdomen. When she was asked what was wrong she replied that, Dr. Bs child is coming! This immediately sent Breuer away from her at the highest speed as he was not able to cope with this new revelation. He then p assed her onto a colleague for further treatment as he had already realised that his wife was jealous of his treatment of Anna O and this new revelation only compounded the problem. Forrester (1990) draws attention to the fact that Breuer acknowledged the importance of sexuality in the causes of neuroses. But despite this, he backed away from Anna Os case as soon as it came to the surface. As Forrester (1990) points out, Freud sees this as Breuers mistake and sees in it the birth of a psychoanalysis, especially one of its most important aspects: transference, and more specifically: sexual transference. Through the way that Breuer describes Anna Os progress in his new type of therapy, the path which the theory of hysteria and its treatment takes gradually emerges. Although Anna Os case was reported later it was Breuer Freud (1893) that used her case as the basis for their theory of hysteria. Breuer Freud (1893) state that they believe that the symptoms of hysteria have, at their root cause, some kind of causal event, perhaps occurring many years before the symptoms expose themselves. The patient is unlikely to easily reveal what this event is simply because they are not consciously aware of what it is, or that there is a causal connection. They are not worried by the seeming disproportionate nature of the precipitating event and subsequent symptoms. In fact they welcome this disproportionate nature as a defining characteristic of hysteria. Their analysis likens the root cause, or pathogenesis, of hysteria to that caused by a traumatic neurosis    perhaps similar to what we would now call post-traumatic stress disorder. The patient has, therefore, suffered a psychical trauma that manifests itself in this hysteria. The idea that the psychical trauma simply has a precipitating effect on the symptoms is dismissed by the authors referring to the evidence they have from the case studies of the remarkable progress their patients made after the memory of the psychical trauma has been exorcised through its explication and re-experiencing. Importantly, in defining the problem, Breuer Freud (1893) see the symptoms as a kind of failure of reaction to the original event. The memory of the event can only fade if the reaction to that event has not been suppressed. And it is here that there is a clear precursor to ideas central to later Freudian theory about the nature and causes of repression. In normal reactions to psychical traumas, the authors talk of a cathartic effect resulting in a release of the energy. The reverse of this, the suppression of catharsis (Freeman, 1972), is seen here as the cause of the symptoms adequately evidenced by the new treatment of a kind of delayed catharsis that appears to release the patient from their symptoms. What, then, are the mechanisms by which a psychical trauma of some kind is not reacted to sufficiently? Two answers are provided here, the first that because of the circumstances of the trauma, it was not possible to form a reaction in other words the reactions is suppressed. The second is that a reaction may not have been possible due to the mental state of the person at that time for example during a period of paralysing fear. The circumstances in which the failure of a reaction occurs is also instrumental in the burying of these thoughts and feelings and helps to explain why the patient themselves is not able to access them in the normal ways. Frau Emmy von N. Freuds interest in hysteria and in hypnosis was certainly piqued by both Charcot and Breuer and having collaborated on the latters work with Anna O including the belief that he had found a theory of practical benefit it was only a matter of time before he became further involved in the treatment of hysteria himself. Reported as the second case history in The Studies on Hysteria, (Breuer Freud, 1991) a patient of Freuds, Frau Emmy von N., exhibited symptoms that typified hysteria and Freud resolved to treat her. He reports that the patient was 40 years old, was from a good family and of high education and intelligence. She had been widowed at a young age, leaving her to look after her two children this she ascribed as the cause of her current malady. Freud describes her first meeting as being continually interrupted by the patient breaking off, and suddenly displaying signs of disgust and horror on her face while telling him to, Keep still! and other similar remonstrations. Apart from this the patient also had a series of tics, some facial, but the most pronounced being a clacking sound which littered her utterances. Freuds initial treatment was more physical than mental. She was told to take warm baths and be given massages. This was combined with hypnosis in which Freud simply suggested that she sleep well and that her symptoms would lessen. This was helped by the fact that Freud reports that Frau Emmy von N. was an extremely good hypnotic subject he only had to raise his finger and make a few simple suggestions to put her into a trance. Freud wonders whether this compliance is due to previous exposure to hypnosis and a desire to please. A week later Freud asked his patient why she was so easily frightened. She replied with a story about a traumatic experience that had occurred when she was younger her older brothers and sisters had thrown dead animals at her. As she described these stories to Freud, he reports that she was, panting for breath as well as displaying obvious difficulty with the emotions that she was dealing with. After these emotions have been expressed, she became calmer and more peaceful. Freud also uses touch to reinforce his suggestion that these unnerving images have been removed. Under hypnosis, Freud continued to elicit these stories that demonstrated why she was so often nervous. She explained to Freud that she had once had a maidservant who told her stories of life in an asylum including beatings and patients being tied to chairs. Freud then explained to her that this was not the usual situation in asylums. She had also apparently seen hallucinations at one point, seeing the same person in tw o places and being transfixed by it. While she had been nursing her dying brother, who was taking large quantities of morphine for the pain he was in, he would frequently grab her suddenly. Freud saw this as part of a pattern of her being seized against her will and resolved to investigate it further. It was a few days after this that quite a significant point in the therapy came. Emmy von N. was again explaining about the frightening stories of the asylum and Freud stopped himself from correcting her, intuitively realising that he had to let her give full vent to her fears, without redirecting her course. This is perhaps a turning point in the way in which Freud treated his patient, made clearer by the historical context in which this scene operates. While still seen as authority figures now, physicians were much stronger authority figures then. This combined with the greater imbalance of power between men and women would have meant that the patient would be naturally hesitant about taking any control over their own treatment. Forrester (1990) sees this as a shift in the pattern of authority between the doctor and the patient that originated in Breuers treatment of Anna O a move from the telling the patient what to do, to listening to what the patient has to say. Forrester (1990 ) constructs the relationship that Freud began to build with Emmy von N. as more of a framework of authority within which the patient was able to express her thoughts and feelings to the doctor and in this sense the doctors job is to help the patient keep up this outpouring of stories. At this stage of the development of the therapy, the facilitation of the story-telling is being achieved by hypnosis, although later Freud was to move away from this. How great the shift in the power balance was, it is difficult to tell a this distance, but what is clear from the case report is that Emmy von N.s case provided a much more convoluted series of psychical traumas and symptoms than that presented by Anna O. While Anna Os symptoms seemed to match the traumatic events rather neatly, Emmy von Ns mind was not nearly as well organised. At one point Freud discovers that taking the lift to his office causes his patient a considerable amount of stress. To try and examine where this comes from he explores whether she has had any previous traumatic experiences in lifts a logical first step within the theoretical framework. Coincidentally, it appears, the patient mentions that she is very worried about her daughter in relation to elevators. The next logical step then should be that talking about this fear should release the affect and lead to catharsis, but this is not what Freud finds. The next part of the puzzle is revealed when he finds out t hat she is currently menstruating, then finally the last part falls into place when he finds out that as her daughter has been suffering ovarian problems, she has had to travel in a lift in order to meet with her doctor. After some deliberation Freud realises that there is in fact a false connection between the patients menstruation and the worry at her daughter using a lift. It is this confusion of connections that Freud begins to realise is a form of defence to the traumatic thoughts. Freuds Treatment of Hysteria In the final part of Studies in Hysteria Freud sets out his theory of hysteria and what he has learnt about its treatment. Not only does this part of the book recap some of the themes already discussed but it also highlights some future direction in which Freuds work would travel. Two key signposts are seen: first in his stance on hypnotism, and secondly in his view on what constitutes hysteria. In an attempt to be of benefit to patients with hysteria, who he believed this treatment would help, he tried to treat as many as possible. The problem for him was how to tell the difference between a patient with hysteria and one without. Freud chose an interesting solution to what might have been a protracted problem of diagnosis. He simply treated patients who seemed   to have hysteria and let the results of that treatment speak for themselves. What this immediately did was to widen out the object of his enquiry to neuroses in general. Picking up on the lightly touched theme of sexual tr ansference between Breuer and Anna O mentioned earlier, Freud made his feelings about the roots of neurotic problems quite clear, and in the process set the agenda for psychoanalysis for the next century or more. He believed that one of the primal factors in neuroses lay in sexual matters. In particular Freud came to acknowledge that peoples neuroses rarely came in a pure form, as the early and almost impossibly neat case of Anna O had signposted, and that in fact people were more of a mixed bag. Looking back through the cases reported in Studies on Hysteria Freud explains that he came to see a sexual undercurrent in his notes that had not been at the forefront of his mind when he had treated the patients. Especially in the case of Anna O as already noted Freud felt Breuer had missed a trick. What these ideas seem to be adding up to is almost a rejection of hysteria, if not as a separate diagnosis, certainly as a category of disease practically amenable to treatment. Freud, however, is defensive about rejecting the idea of hysteria as a separate diagnosis, despite the fact that that is the direction in which his thoughts are heading. At this stage he believes it can be treated as a separate part of a patients range of symptoms and the effect of this treatment will be governed by its relative importance overall. Those patients, like Anna O, who have relatively pure cases of hysteria will respond well to the cathartic treatment, while those diluted cases will not. The second key signpost for the future of psychoanalysis was Freuds use of hypnosis. What he found was that many of the patients he saw were simply not hypnotisable Freud claims unwillingness on their part but other writers are of the opinion that he was simply not that good at it (Forrester, 1990). This was a problem for Freud because Breuers formulation of the treatment for hysteria required that events were recollected that were not normally available to a person. Hypnosis had originally proved a good method and indeed in Anna Os case the only method for gaining access to these past events. In response, Freud now turned away from hypnosis to develop his own techniques for eliciting the patients traumatic events. These were quite simple: he insisted that the patient remember what the traumatic event was, and if they still could not, he would ask the patient to lie down and close their eyes nowadays one of the archetypal images of patient and analyst. Freud saw the patients relu ctance of his patients to report their traumatic events as a one of the biggest hurdles in his coalescing form of therapy. He came up with the idea that there was some psychical force within the patient that stopped the memories from being retrieved. From the patients he had treated, he had found that the memories that were being held back were often of an embarrassing or shameful nature. If was for this reason that the patient was activating psychical defence mechanisms. At this stage he hoped to be able to show in the future that it was this defence or repulsion of the traumatic event to the depths of the memory that was causing so much psychical pain to the patient. Overcoming this psychical force, Freud found, was not as simple as insisting, and he developed some further techniques. Patients would easily drift off their point or simply dry up and it needed more powerful persuasion to return them to the traumatic event. One particular technique he found extremely useful and would almost invariably use it when treating patients. This involved placing his hand on the patients head and instructing them that when they feel the pressure they will also see an image of their traumatic event. Having assured the patient that whatever they see, they should not worry that this image is inappropriate or too shameful to discuss, then they are asked to attempt a description of the image. Freud believed that this system worked by distracting the patient, in a similar way as hypnosis, from their conscious searching for the psychical trauma and allowed their mind to float free. Even using the new technique of applying pressure, it did not provide direct access to the psychical trauma. What Freud found was that it tended to signal a jumping off point or a way-station, somewhere on the way to or from the trauma. Sometimes the image produced would provide a new starting point from which the patient could work, sometimes it fitted into the flow of the subject of discussion. Occasionally the new image would bring a long-forgotten idea to the patients mind which would surprise them and initially seem to be unrelated, but later turn out to have a connection. Freud was so pleased with his new pressure technique that, in complex cases, he would often use it continuously on the patient. This procedure would bring to light memories that had been hitherto completely forgotten, as well as new connections between these memories and even, sometimes, thoughts that the patient doesnt even believe to be their own. Freud is careful to point out that although his pressure technique was useful, there were a number of very strong forms of defence that stopped him gaining easy access to the patients psychical trauma. He often found that in the first instance, applying pressure by his hand to the patient would not work, but when he insisted to the patient that it would work the next time, it often would. Still, the patient would sometimes immediately reinterpret or, indeed, begin to edit what was seen, thus making the reporting much less useful. Freud makes it clear that sometimes the most useful observations or memories of the patient are those that they consider to be of least use or relevance. Also, the memories will tend to emerge in a haphazard fashion, only later, and with the skill of the analyst, being fitted together into a coherent picture. Freud refers to this as a kind of censoring of the traumatic events, as though it can only be glimpsed in a mirror or partially occluded around a corne r. Slowly but sure the analyst begins to build up a picture with the accretion of material. There is nothing, Freud believed that is not relevant every piece of information is a link in the chain, another clue to the event that has traumatised the psyche. Another major component of psychoanalysis makes its first appearance in the Studies on Hysteria. Freud describes a final defence or block against the work of treating hysteria in the very relationship between the patient and doctor. Indeed, Freud sees this defence is sure to arise, and perhaps the most difficult defence of all to overcome. The first of the three circumstances in which it may arise is a simple, probably small, breakdown in the relationship between the physician and patient. It might be that the patient is unsure about the physicians techniques or alternatively has felt slighted in the treatment in some way. This can be rectified with a sensitive discussion. The second of the three circumstances occurs when the patient becomes fearful that they will lose their independence because of a reliance on their treating physician. As almost all of Freuds patients who had hysteria were women, this could be conceived as a sexual reliance. The third circumstance is where the pati ent begins to take the problem that they are trying to resolve and transfer it onto the physician, thereby seeing their problem there instead of where it really exists. Freud provides the straightforward example of the sexual transference of a female patient of his who suddenly developed the vision of kissing him. He reports that the patient could not be analysed any further until this block had been addressed. The mechanism by which this transference happens, he posits, is that the patient creates a false connection between the compulsion which is the basis for their treatment and the therapist, rather than its original recipient. In treating these defences Freud makes it clear that the main aim should be to make the patient aware that this problem exists, and then once they are aware of it, the problem is largely dealt with. The challenge, then, is getting the patient to admit to these potentially embarrassing feelings. The Aetiology of Hysteria The development of Freuds theory of the aetiology of hysteria provides one of the most insightful, and sometimes controversial, areas of his work. The formation of the theory, like the work on its treatment, provided another important testing ground for some of the basic elements of what would later become psychoanalysis. Previous authors, including Breuer in the joint work with Freud in Studies on Hysteria, gave great weight to the heredity factors in the causes of hysteria. Freud meanwhile acknowledged these ideas, but in Heredity and the Aetiology of the Neuroses (Freud, 1896b) set out the three factors he believed were important and began to formulate a new theory. The causes of hysteria could be broken down into: (1) Preconditions this would include hereditary factors, (2) concurrent causes which are generalised causes and (3) specific causes, these being specific to the hysteria itself. It is in these specific causes he believed he had found an important contribution to aetiology of the condition. One of the common factors of the patients Freud was seeing, and the one he was coming to see as defining, was in their sexual problems. He reports that while many suffered from a range of different symptoms such as constipation, dyspepsia and fatigue, almost all of them had some kind of sexual problems. These ranged from the inability to achieve orgasm to a more general inability to have a satisfying sexually relationship. Freud saw this as a very significant problem as he maintains that the nervous systems needs to be regularly purged of sexual tension. This pattern across his patients, and the development of his theory of traumatic psychical events, led him to wonder what past events could have caused the sexual dysfunction the patients with hysteria were manifesting. Radically, and expecting no small amount of opposition to the idea, Freud advanced the theory that these neuroses were caused by sexual abuse before the age of sexual maturity. Of the thirteen cases that Freud had tre ated at the time of the paper, all of them had been subject to sexual abuse at an early age. However, Freud does make it clear that the information about their sexual lives is not obtained without some considerable pressure, and it only emerges in a fragmentary way that has later to be pieced together by the therapist. At this early stage of the theory, Freud believed that the sexual abuse left a psychical trace and formed the traumatic experience which was locked away in the depths of the mind. These ideas were much further developed and expanded on in Further remarks on the neuro-psychoses of defence (Freud, 1896a). Earlier Freud had grouped together hysteria with hallucinatory states and obsessions (Freud, 1894) and had begun to formulate the idea that all of these conditions had a common aetiology. In particular, Freud felt these were all part of an area where the ideas of psychological defences and psychological repression were important. Freud had found that patients he had seen had suffered sexual abuse sometimes as early as two years old and up to the age of ten, which he drew as an artificial cut-off point. What other theorists saw as a heredity, Freud saw as the confluence of factors for example if a boy had been sexually abused when he was five then it was likely that his brother would have been abused by the same person. Rather than seeing heredity as a separate factor in hysteria, he saw the sexual abuse as a replacement for heredity, sometimes exclusively, as the root cause in itself. The theory shows an interesting divergence in the analysis of obsessional neuroses. Here, Freud believed that the obsessional neuroses were caused by a sexual activity   in childhood rather than the sexual passivity typical of abuse. These ideas linked in neatly to the greater preponderance of obsessional neuroses in males. A logical division is therefore made with the females, the apparently more passive sex suffering from hysteria, while the apparently more active sex suffering from obsessions. In searching for the aetiology of these two conditions, it is here that Freud prefigures his future thinking on stages of sexual development by introducing the idea that the development of neuroses and/or hysteria is/are dependent on when the sexual abuse occurs in the developmental stages of the child, with sexual maturation providing the cut-off point. In The Aetiology of Hysteria Freud again makes clear his divergence from his mentor, Charcot, in claiming that heredity is not the most important factor in the aetiology of hysteria (Freud 1896c). Freud (1896c) travels back through the life-histories of the patients he has treated looking for the original source of the psychical trauma, discounting all sexual experiences at puberty and later. It is only in pre-pubescent children, when the potential for harm is at its greatest that there lies a sufficient cause. Freuds theory revolves around the idea that at a

The Men of Mother Goose Nursery Rhymes Essay -- essays research papers

The Men of Mother Goose Nursery Rhymes â€Å"I Love Little Pussy† I love little pussy, /Her coat is so warm, /And if I don’t hurt her, /She’ll do me no harm. /So I’ll not pull her tail, /Nor drive her away, /But pussy and I, /Very gently will play. (http://www.zelo.com/family/nursery/pussy.asp) â€Å"Georgie Porgie† Georgie Porgie, puddin’ and pie, /Kissed the girls and made them cry. /When the boys came out to play, /Georgie Porgie ran away. (http://www.zelo.com/family/nursery/georgie.asp) As a young child, mother goose nursery rhymes are nearly the entire basis for learning. By memorizing and reciting these verses, children develop memorization skills, verbal skills through communicating them effectively, and vocabulary. Of course, these nursery rhymes also establish valuable life lessons too. â€Å"Humpty Dumpty† and â€Å"Jack and Jill† both teach us about the violence that can occur as a result of carelessness, and â€Å"Queen of Hearts† teaches children that bad things happen to those who steal. But not all of these nursery rhymes come with such happy lessons. The two that I have chosen teach a more morbid lesson. Each is about how men pursue women for sex. Both illustrate examples of men using women for sex and discarding them, however, their approaches stem from roots as far apart as the polar caps. In â€Å"Georgie Porgie†, Georgie is portrayed as an abusive character. Someone who takes the more up-front, perverted, approach to women. Georgie is illustrated as someone who takes advantage ...

Hacking :: science

Hacking Describe a negative aspect of ICT’s impact on the information society. Describe how ICT has brought this about and what society is has done in response to it. Abstract Hacking has been and still disease different societies suffer from. The essay aims to provide the reader with knowledge regarding the effects hacking caused to our society, and how the society responded and tried to solve or minimize those effects. Different issues regarding hacking are discussed, such as the motivations that were behind guiding hackers who were at first computer professional to perform unauthorized activities, at the same time a discussion about the types of attacks can be found. The society response to hacking attacks lacks till this moment the ability to stop or completely prevent attacks from happening because as long as security tools are developed, more sophisticated hacking attacks are invented. That’s why we should start to think about hacker’s psychology as the main way to prevent and stop attacks by understanding their needs or desires. Introduction The Oxford English Dictionary defines hacking as â€Å"cut or chop roughly; mangle: cut (one’s way)†Ã¢â‚¬ ¦ to its present definition as â€Å"gain unauthorized access (to data in a computer)†. Banks (1997:11) defines hacking as â€Å"something that boring mainframe computer operators did to improve performance and battle boredom.† Here banks focuses on boredom as the reason of hacking. A more technical definition of hacking according to Digital Guards data base (2001) is â€Å"unauthorized use, or attempts to circumvent or bypass the security mechanisms of an information system or network.† Darlington (2001) believes hacking is not limited to accessing data or information but also includes an attack on the privacy of all people. Almost all different opinions agree on the illegality of hacking. On the other hand the word hacker is the agent of hack or hacking and it was defined as a person who enjoys accessing files whether for fun, imposing power or the interest related to the accessed files or data according to Taylor (1999). While Marotta (in Taylor, 1993) has a negative view of the hacker as a data lord, a barbarian who takes what he wants. Himanen (2001) defines hacker as any person who performs illegal actions whether they were related to computer or not which means the usage of a device apart from its functionality. Seems hacking according to Himanen is related to any illegal or unauthorized action. Seebach (1999) finds hacker as a person who feels delighted and full of joy when being able to access a system and break the security utilities but Himanen (2001) doesn’t consider hacker as a thief.

eBay Powerseller Essay -- essays research papers

The secrets of eBay Power Sellers! How to MAKE MONEY on eBay Use this valuable guide as a MONEY MAKING TOOL. Read it from start to finish over and over. The amount of information and wholesale sources you will find seems overwhelming at first, but don’t be intimidated. Take your time and be patient. It is going to take you several days to check out the sites because there are just so many items to choose from. This guide is updated for 2003 and the resources are used by eBay Power Sellers ALL the time. I have been selling on eBay for some time, almost 3 years now. Almost from the beginning, I wondered how Power Sellers obtain products so cheap that they can sell on eBay and STILL MAKE MONEY. Here are THE ANSWERS. Since eBay has millions of users, I don’t feel it’s going to hurt my business to share this easy to read guide. You’ll find it easy to follow and learn the tips & tricks to selling successfully on eBay along with the very best wholesale sources to get you started. REMEMBER! Read this guide over and over again. Check out all the sites and links. It’s amazing to find that you can buy products at incredibly low prices when you know where to get them at true wholesale. SELLING ON EBAY 1. WHAT TO SELL & HOW DO YOU WANT TO SELL IT: It does not have to be something that you enjoy selling, but it is easier to sell something that you would use yourself and that you believe in. I enjoy selling anything that does not earn me a one way ticket to the dark side in the afterlife, (lol), but will make me a profit in the present life. For starters you can purchase antiques, CDs, and just about anything you can imagine at true wholesale prices, and either list them on e-bay, your own website, take them to the flea-market, or your own retail store and make some real money with them. In fact, there many people around the country who have become a â€Å"Wholesale Supplier† themselves. What I mean by this is that they will get a few sample products, head to the flea market or local convenience stores, mark up their samples 10-15 %, and eureka, they are in business. At that point, all they need to do is keep their clients shelves stocked and count their cash!! I will tell you this a few times throughout this guide and remember it†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Do Not Be Afraid To Talk To People. 2. TIMES TO LIST: Never list your items to end during the day, unless you end them on the weeke... ... you will find top-quality merchandise from your favorite name brand companies! You'll also find a great selection with new products added every day. The products are top quality, just like those in the nation's finest department stores, and they're backed by the warranties you expect. Once you get your feet wet, and want to make some international contacts, go to http://www.globalsources.com , and http://www.allproducts.com . Both of these sites will put you in touch with suppliers from all around the globe. Ok, now for the Free To Sell ebook bonus. Simply click on the link below & save it somewhere easy to find on your computer. It is a virus free download. Simply follow the instructions when you execute the saved file. All you need to do is download the main ebook with this link, then download any other titles you wish from within the main ebook!! It is great!! http://huas.net/dlbin/freetosell6.exe These guide & bonuses are fantastic!! They are going to be very helpful to you. We have never had any complaints on this guide and have had many customers thank us over and over for helping them get their online, or retail business started. BEST OF LUCK AND HAVE FUN!!

The Twilight Saga 2: New Moon Chapter 13 KILLER

IF IT WAS ANYONE BUT JACOB, I THOUGHT TO MYSELF, shaking my head as I drove down the forest-lined highway to La Push. I still wasn't sure if I was domg the right thing, but I'd made a compromise with myself. I couldn't condone what Jacob and his friends, his pack, were doing. I understood now what he'd said last nightthat I might not want to see him againand I could have called him as he'd suggested, but that felt cowardly. I owed him a face-to-face conversation, at least. I would tell him to his face that I couldn't just overlook what was going on. I couldn't be friends with a killer and say nothing, let the killing continue That would make me a monster, too. But I couldn't not warn him, either. I had to do what I could to protect him. I pulled up to the Blacks' house with my lips pressed together into a hard line. It was bad enough that my best friend was a werewolf. Did he have to be a monster, too? The house was dark, no lights in the windows, but I didn't care if I woke them. My fist thudded against the front door with angry energy; the sound reverberated through the walls. â€Å"Come in,† I heard Billy call after a minute, and a light flicked on. I twisted the knob; it was unlocked. Billy was leaning around an open doorway just off the little kitchen, a bathrobe around his shoulders, not in his chair yet. When he saw who it was, his eyes widened briefly, and then his face turned stoic. â€Å"Well, good morning, Bella. What are you doing up so early?† â€Å"Hey, Billy. I need to talk to Jakewhere is he?† â€Å"Um I don't really know,† he lied, straight-faced. â€Å"Do you know what Charlie is doing this morning?† I demanded, sick of the stalling. â€Å"Should I?† â€Å"He and half the other men in town are all out in the woods with guns, hunting giant wolves.† Billy's expression flickered, and then went blank. â€Å"So I'd like to talk to Jake about that, if you don't mind,† I continued. Billy pursed his thick lips for a long moment. â€Å"I'd bet he's still asleep,† he finally said, nodding toward the tiny hallway off the front room. â€Å"He's out late a lot these days. Kid needs his restprobably you shouldn't wake him.† â€Å"It's my turn,† I muttered under my breath as I stalked to the hallway. Billy sighed. Jacob's tiny closet of a room was the only door in the yard-long hallway. I didn't bother to knock. I threw the door open; it slammed against the wall with a bang. Jacobstill wearing just the same black cut-off sweats he'd worn last nightwas stretched diagonally across the double bed that took up all of his room but a few inches around the edges. Even on a slant, it wasn't long enough; his feet hung off the one end and his head off the other. He was fast asleep, snoring lightly with his mouth hanging open. The sound of the door hadn't even made him twitch. His face was peaceful with (deep sleep, all the angry lines smoothed out. There were circles under his eyes that I hadn't noticed before. Despite his ridiculous size, he looked very young now, and very weary. Pity shook me. I stepped back out, and shut the door quietly behind me. Billy stared with curious, guarded eyes as I walked slowly back into the front room. â€Å"I think I'll let him get some rest.† Billy nodded, and then we gazed at each other for a minute. I was dying to ask him about his part in this. What did he think of what his son had become? But I knew how he'd supported Sam from the very beginning, and so I supposed the murders must not bother him. How he justified that to himself I couldn't imagine. I could see many questions for me in his dark eyes, but he didn't voice them either. â€Å"Look,† I said, breaking the loud silence. â€Å"I'll be down at the beach for a while. When he wakes up, tell him I'm waiting for him, okay?† â€Å"Sure, sure,† Billy agreed. I wondered if he really would. Well, if he didn't, I'd tried, right? I drove down to First Beach and parked in the empty dirt lot. It was still darkthe gloomy predawn of a cloudy dayand when I cut the headlights it was hard to see. I had to let my eyes adjust before I could find the path that led through the tall hedge of weeds. It was colder here, with the wind whipping off the black water, and I shoved my hands deep into the pockets of my winter jacket. At least the rain had stopped. I paced down the beach toward the north seawall. I couldn't see St. James or the other islands, just the vague shape of the water's edge. I picked my way carefully across the rocks, watching out for driftwood that might trip me. I found what I was looking for before I realized I was looking for it. It materialized out of the gloom when it was just a few feet away: a long bone-white driftwood tree stranded deep on the rocks. The roots twisted up at the seaward end, like a hundred brittle tentacles. I couldn't be sure that it was the same tree where Jacob and I had had our first conversationa conversation that had begun so many different, tangled threads of my lifebut it seemed to be in about the same place I sat down where I'd sat before, and stared out across the invisible sea. Seeing Jacob like thatinnocent and vulnerable in sleephad stolen all my revulsion, dissolved all my anger. I still couldn't turn a blind sye to what was happening, like Billy seemed to, but I couldn't condemn Jacob for it either. Love didn't work that way, I decided. Once you cared about a person, it was impossible to be logical about them anymore. Jacob was my friend whether he killed people or not. And I didn't know what I was going to do about that. When I pictured him sleeping so peacefully, I felt an overpowering urge to protect him. Completely illogical. Illogical or not, I brooded over the memory his peaceful face, trying to come up with some answer, some way to shelter him, while the sky slowly turned gray. â€Å"Hi,Bella.† Jacob's voice came from the darkness and made me jump. It was soft, almost shy, but I'd been expecting some forewarning from the noisy rocks, and so it still startled me. I could see his silhouette against the coming sunriseit looked enormous. â€Å"Jake?† He stood several paces away, shifting his weight from foot to foot anxiously. â€Å"Billy told me you came bydidn't take you very long, did it? I knew you could figure it out.† â€Å"Yeah, I remember the right story now,† I whispered. It was quiet for a long moment and, though it was still too dark to see well, my skin prickled as if his eyes were searching my face. There must have been enough light for him to read my expression, because when he spoke again, his voice was suddenly acidic. â€Å"You could have just called,† he said harshly. I nodded. â€Å"I know.† Jacob started pacing along the rocks. If I listened very hard, I could just hear the gentle brush of his feet on the rocks behind the sound of the waves. The rocks had clattered like castanets for me. â€Å"Why did you come?† he demanded, not halting his angry stride. â€Å"I thought it would be better face-to-face.† He snorted. â€Å"Oh, much better.† â€Å"Jacob, I have to warn you† â€Å"About the rangers and the hunters? Don't worry about it. We already know.† â€Å"Don't worry about it?† I demanded in disbelief. â€Å"Jake, they've got guns! They're setting traps and offering rewards and† â€Å"We can take care of ourselves,† he growled, still pacing. â€Å"They're not going to catch anything. They're only making it more difficultthey'll start disappearing soon enough, too.† â€Å"Jake!† I hissed. â€Å"What? It's just a fact.† My voice was pale with revulsion. â€Å"How can you feel that way? You know these people. Charlie's out there!† The thought made my stomach twist. He came to an abrupt stop. â€Å"What more can we do?† he retorted. The sun turned the clouds a slivery pink above us. I could see his expression now; it was angry, frustrated, betrayed. â€Å"Could you well, try to not be a werewolf?† I suggested in a whisper. He threw his hands up in the air. â€Å"Like I have a choice about it!† he shouted. â€Å"And how would that help anything, if you're worried about people disappearing?† â€Å"I don't understand you.† He glared at me, his eyes narrowing and his mouth twisting into a snarl. â€Å"You know what makes me so mad I could just spit?† I flinched away from his hostile expression. He seemed to be waiting for an answer, so I shook my head. â€Å"You're such a hypocrite, Bellathere you sit, terrified of me! How is that fair?† His hands shook with anger. â€Å"Hypocrite? How does being afraid of a monster make me a hypocrite?† â€Å"Ugh!† he groaned, pressing his trembling fists to his temples and squeezing his eyes shut. â€Å"Would you listen to yourself?† â€Å"What?† He took two steps toward me, leaning over me and glaring with fury. â€Å"Well, I'm so sorry that I can't be the right kind of monster for you, Bella. I guess I'm just not as great as a bloodsucker, am I?† I jumped to my feet and glared back. â€Å"No, you're not!† I shouted. â€Å"It's not what you are, stupid, it's what you do!† â€Å"What's that supposed to mean?† He roared, his entire frame quivering with rage. I was taken entirely by surprise when Edward's voice cautioned me. â€Å"Be very careful, Bella,† his velvet voice warned. â€Å"Don't push him too far. You need to calm him down.† Even the voice in my head was making no sense today. I listened to him, though. I would do anything for that voice. â€Å"Jacob,† I pleaded, making my tone soft and even. â€Å"Is it really necessary to kill people, Jacob? Isn't there some other way? I mean, if vampires can find a way to survive without murdering people, couldn't you give it a try, too?† He straightened up with a jerk, like my words had sent an electric shock through him. His eyebrows shot up and his eyes stared wide. â€Å"Killing people?† he demanded. â€Å"What did you think we were talking about?† He wasn't trembling anymore. He looked at me with half-hopeful disbelief. â€Å"I thought we were talking about your disgust for werewolves.† â€Å"No, Jake, no. It's not that you're a wolf. That's fine,† I promised him, and I knew as I said the words that I meant them. I really didn't care if he turned into a big wolfhe was still Jacob. â€Å"If you could just find a way not to hurt people that's all that upsets me. These ate innocent people, Jake, people like Charlie, and I can't just look the other way while you† â€Å"Is that all? Really?† he interrupted me, a smile breaking across his face. â€Å"You're just scared because I'm a murderer? That's the only reason?† â€Å"Isn't that reason enough?† He started to laugh. â€Å"Jacob Black, this is so notfunny!† â€Å"Sure, sure,† he agreed, still chortling. He took one long stride and caught me in another vice-tight bear hug. â€Å"You really, honestly don't mind that I morph into a giant dog?† he asked, his voice joyful in my ear. â€Å"No,† I gasped. â€Å"Can'tbreatheJake!† He let me go, but took both my hands. â€Å"I'm not a killer, Bella.† I studied his face, and it was clear that this was the truth. Relief pulsed through me. â€Å"Really?† I asked. â€Å"Really,† he promised solemnly. I threw my arms around him. It reminded me of that first day with the motorcycleshe was bigger, though, and I felt even more like a child now. Like that other time, he stroked my hair. â€Å"Sorry I called you a hypocrite,† he apologized. â€Å"Sorry I called you a murderer.† He laughed. I thought of something then, and pulled away from him so that I could see his face. My eyebrows furrowed in anxiety. â€Å"What about Sam? And the others?† He shook his head, smiling like a huge burden had been removed from his shoulders. â€Å"Of course not. Don't you remember what we call ourselves?† The memory was clearI'd just been thinking of that very day. â€Å"Protectors?† â€Å"Exactly.† â€Å"But I don't understand. What's happening in the woods? The missing hikers, the blood?† His face was serious, worried at once. â€Å"We're trying to do our job, Bella. We're trying to protect them, but we're always just a little too late.† â€Å"Protect them from what? Is there really a bear out there, too?† â€Å"Bella, honey, we only protect people from one thingour one enemy. It's the reason we existbecause they do.† I stared at him blankly for one second before I understood. Then the blood drained from my face and a thin, wordless cry of horror broke through my lips. He nodded. â€Å"I thought you, of all people, would reali2e what was really going on.† â€Å"Laurent,† I whispered. â€Å"He's still here.† Jacob blinked twice, and cocked his head to one side. â€Å"Who's Laurent?† I tried to sort out the chaos in my head so that I could answer. â€Å"You knowyou saw him in the meadow. You were there† The words came out in a wondering tone as it all sunk in. â€Å"You were there, and you kept him from killing me† â€Å"Oh, the black-haired leech?† He grinned, a tight, fierce grin. â€Å"Was that his name?† I shuddered. â€Å"What were you thinking?† I whispered. â€Å"He could have killed you! Jake, you don't realize how dangerous† Another laugh interrupted me â€Å"Bella, one lone vampire isn't much of a problem for a pack as big as ours. It was so easy, it was hardly even fun!† â€Å"What was so easy?† â€Å"Killing the bloodsucker who was going to kill you. Now, I don't count that towards the whole murder thing,† he added quickly. â€Å"Vampires don't count as people.† I could only mouth the words. â€Å"You killed Laurent?† He nodded. â€Å"Well, it was a group effort,† he qualified. â€Å"Laurent is dead?† I whispered. His expression changed. â€Å"You're not upset about that, are you? He was going to kill youhe was going for the kill, Bella, we were sure of that before we attacked. You know that, right?† â€Å"I know that. No, I'm not upsetI'm† I had to sit down. I stumbled back a step until I felt the driftwood against my calves, and then sank down onto it. â€Å"Laurent is dead. He's not coming back for me.† â€Å"You're not mad? He wasn't one of your friends or anything, was he?† â€Å"My friend?† I stared up at him, confused and dizzy with relief. I started babbling, my eyes getting moist. â€Å"No, Jake. I'm so so relieved. I thought he was going to find meI've been waiting for him every night, just hoping that he'd stop with me and leave Charlie alone. I've been so frightened, Jacob But how? He was a vampire! How did you kill him? He was so strong, so hard, like marble† He sat down next to me and put one big arm around me comfortingly. â€Å"It's what we're made for, Bells. We're strong, too. I wish you would have told me that you were so afraid. You didn't need to be.† â€Å"You weren't around,† I mumbled, lost in thought. â€Å"Oh, right.† â€Å"Wait, JakeI thought you knew, though. Last night, you said it wasn't safe for you to be in my room. I thought you knew that a vampire might be coming. Isn't that what you were talking about?† He looked confused for a minute, and then he ducked his head. â€Å"No, that's not what I meant.† â€Å"Then why didn't you think it was safe for you there?† He looked at me with guilt-ridden eyes. â€Å"I didn't say it wasn't safe for me. I was thinking of you.† â€Å"What do you mean?† He looked down and kicked a rock. â€Å"There's more than one reason I'm not supposed to be around you, Bella. I wasn't supposed to tell you our secret, for one thing, but the other part is that it's not safe for you. If I get too mad too upset you might get hurt.† I thought about that carefully. â€Å"When you were mad before when I was yelling at you and you were shaking ?† â€Å"Yeah.† His face dropped even lower. â€Å"That was pretty stupid of me. I have to keep a better hold on myself. I swore I wasn't going to get mad, no matter what you said to me. But I just got so upser that I was going to lose you that you couldn't deal with what I am† â€Å"What would happen if you got too mad?† I whispered. â€Å"I'd turn into a wolf,† he whispered back. â€Å"You don't need a full moon.† He rolled his eyes. â€Å"Hollywood's version doesn't get much right.† Then he sighed, and was serious again. â€Å"You don't need to be so stressed out, Bells. We're going to take care of this. And we're keeping a special eye on Charlie and the otherswe won't let anything happen to him. Trust me on that.† Something very, very obvious, something I should have grasped at oncebut I'd been so distracted by the idea of Jacob and his friends fighting with Laurent, that I'd completely missed it at the timeoccurred to me only then, when Jacob used the present tense again. We're going to take care of this. It wasn't over. â€Å"Laurent is dead,† I gasped, and my entire body went ice cold. â€Å"Bella?† Jacob asked anxiously, touching my ashen cheek. â€Å"If Laurent died a week ago then someone else is killing people now.† Jacob nodded; his teeth clenched together, and he spoke through them. â€Å"There were two of them. We thought his mate would want to fight usin our stories, they usually get pretty pissed off if you kill their matebut she just keeps running away, and then coming back again. If we could figure out what she was after, it would be easier to take her down. But she makes no sense. She keeps dancing around the edges, like she's testing our defenses, looking for a way inbut in where? Where does she want to go? Sam thinks she's trying to separate us, so she'll have a better chance† His voice faded until it sounded like it was coming through a long tunnel; I couldn't make out the individual words anymore. My forehead dewed with sweat and my stomach rolled like I had the stomach flu again. Exactly like I had the flu. I turned away from him quickly, and leaned over the tree trunk. My body convulsed with useless heaves, my empty stomach contracting with horrified nausea, though there was nothing in it to expel. Victoria was here. Looking for me. Killing strangers in the woods. The woods where Charlie was searching My head spun sickeningly. Jacob's hands caught my shoulderskept me from sliding forward onto the rocks. I could feel his hot breath on my cheek. â€Å"Bella! What's wrong?† â€Å"Victoria,† I gasped as soon as I could catch my breath around the nauseous spasms. In my head, Edward snarled in fury at the name. I felt Jacob pull me up from my slump. He draped me awkwardly across his lap, laying my limp head against his shoulder. He struggled to balance me, to keep me from sagging over, one way or the other He brushed the sweaty hair back from my face. â€Å"Who?† Jacob asked. â€Å"Can you hear me, Bella? Bella?† â€Å"She wasn't Laurent's mate,† I moaned into his shoulder. â€Å"They were just old friends† â€Å"Do you need some water? A doctor? Tell me what to do,† he demanded, frantic. â€Å"I'm not sickI'm scared,† I explained in a whisper. The word scared didn't really seem to cover it. Jacob patted my back. â€Å"Scaled of this Victoria?† I nodded, shuddering. â€Å"Victoria is the red-haired female?† I trembled again, and whimpered, â€Å"Yes.† â€Å"How do you know she wasn't his mate?† â€Å"Laurent told me James was her mate,† I explained, automatically flexing the hand with the scar. He pulled my face around, holding it steady in his big hand. He stared intently into my eyes. â€Å"Did he tell you anything else, Bella? This is important. Do you know what she wants?† â€Å"Of course,† I whispered. â€Å"She wants me.† His eyes flipped wide, then narrowed into slits. â€Å"Why?† he demanded. â€Å"Edward killed James,† I whispered. Jacob held me so tightly that there was no need for me to clutch at the holehe kept me in one piece. â€Å"She did get pissed off. But Laurent said she thought it was fairer to kill me than Edward. Mate for mate. She didn't knowstill doesn't know, I guessthat that† I swallowed hard. â€Å"That things aren't like that with us anymore. Not for Edward, anyway.† Jacob was distracted by that, his face torn between several different expressions. â€Å"Is that what happened? Why the Cullens left?† â€Å"I'm nothing but a human, after all. Nothing special,† I explained, shrugging weakly. Something like a growlnot a real growl, just a human approximationrumbled in Jacob's chest under my ear. â€Å"If that idiot bloodsucker is honestly stupid enough† â€Å"Please,† I moaned. â€Å"Please. Don't.† Jacob hesitated, then nodded once. â€Å"This is important,† he said again, his face all business now. â€Å"This is exactly what we needed to know. We've got to tell the others right away.† He stood, pulling me to my feet. He kept two hands on my waist until he was sure I wasn't going to fall. â€Å"I'm okay,† I lied. He traded his hold on my waist for one of my hands. â€Å"Let's go.† He pulled me back toward the truck. â€Å"Where are we going?† I asked. â€Å"I'm not sure yet,† he admitted. â€Å"I'll call a meeting. Hey, wait here for just a minute, okay?† He leaned me against the side of the truck and released my hand. â€Å"Where are you going?† â€Å"I'll be right back,† he promised. Then he turned and sprinted through the parking lot, across the road, and into the bordering forest. He flitted into the trees, swift and sleek as a deer. â€Å"Jacob!† I yelled after him hoarsely, but he was already gone. It was not a good time to be left alone. Seconds after Jacob was out of sight, I was hyperventilating. I dragged myself into the cab of the truck, and mashed the locks down at once. It didn't make me feel any better. Victoria was already hunting me. It was just luck that she hadn't found me yetjust luck and five teenage werewolves. I exhaled sharply. No matter what Jacob said, the thought of him coming anywhere close to Victoria was horrifying. I didn't care what he could turn into when he got mad. I could see her in my head, her face wild, her hair like flames, deadly, indestructible But, according to Jacob, Laurent was gone. Was that really possible? EdwardI clutched automatically at my chesthad told me how difficult it was to kill a vampire. Only another vampire could do the job. Yet Jake said this was what werewolves were made for He said they were keeping a special eye on Charliethat I should trust the werewolves to keep my father safe. How could I trust that? None of us were safe! Jacob the very least of all, if he was trying to put himself between Victoria and Charlie between Victoria and me. I felt like I might be about to throw up again. A sharp rap on the truck's window made me yelp in terrorbut it was just Jacob, back already. I unlocked the door with trembling, grateful fingers. â€Å"You're really scared, aren't you?† he asked as he climbed in. I nodded. â€Å"Don't be. We'll take care of youand Charlie, too. I promise.† â€Å"The idea of you finding Victoria is scarier than the idea of her finding me,† I whispered. He laughed. â€Å"You've got to have a little more confidence in us than that. It's insulting.† I just shook my head. I'd seen too many vampires in action. â€Å"Where did you go just now?† I asked. He pursed his lips, and said nothing. â€Å"What? Is it a secret?† He frowned. â€Å"Not really. It's kind of weird, though. I don't want to freak you out.† â€Å"I'm sort of used to weird by this point, you know.† I tried to smile without much success. Jacob grinned back easily. â€Å"Guess you'd have to be. Okay. See, when we're wolves, we can hear each other.† My eyebrows pulled down in confusion. â€Å"Not hear sounds,† he went on, â€Å"but we can hear thoughtseach other's anywayno matter how far away from each other we are. It really helps when we hunt, but it's a big pain otherwise. It's embarrassinghaving no secrets like that. Freaky, eh?† â€Å"Is that what you meant last night, when you said you would tell them you'd seen me, even though you didn't want to?† â€Å"You're quick.† â€Å"Thanks.† â€Å"You're also very good with weird. I thought that would bother you.† â€Å"It's not well, you're not the first person I've known who could do that. So it doesn't seem so weird to me.† â€Å"Really Waitare you talking about your bloodsuckers?† â€Å"I wish you wouldn't call them that.† He laughed. â€Å"Whatever. The Cullens, then?† â€Å"Just just Edward.† I pulled one arm surreptitiously around my torso. Jacob looked surprisedunpleasantly so. â€Å"I thought those were just stories. I've heard legends about vampires who could do extra stuff, but I thought that was just a myth.† â€Å"Is anything just a myth anymore?† I asked him wryly. He scowled. â€Å"Guess not. Okay, we're going to meet Sam and the others at the place we go to ride our bikes.† I started the truck and headed back up the road. â€Å"So did you just turn into a wolf now, to talk to Sam?† I asked, curious. Jacob nodded, seeming embarrassed. â€Å"I kept it real shortI tried not to think about you so they wouldn't know what was going on. I was afraid Sam would tell me I couldn't bring you.† â€Å"That wouldn't have stopped me.† I couldn't get rid of my perception of Sam as the bad guy. My teeth clenched together whenever I heard his name. â€Å"Well, it would have stopped me,† Jacob said, morose now. â€Å"Remember how I couldn't finish my sentences last night? How I couldn't just tell you the whole story?† â€Å"Yeah. You looked like you were choking on something.† He chuckled darkly. â€Å"Close enough. Sam told me I couldn't tell you. He's the head of the pack, you know. He's the Alpha. When he tells us to do something, or not to do somethingwhen he really means it, well, we can't just ignore him.† â€Å"Weird,† I muttered. â€Å"Very,† he agreed. â€Å"It's kind of a wolf thing.† â€Å"Huh† was the best response I could think of. â€Å"Yeah, there's a load of stuff like thatwolf things. I'm still learning. I can't imagine what it was like for Sam, trying to deal with this alone. It sucks bad enough to go through it with a whole pack for support.† â€Å"Sam was alone?† â€Å"Yeah.† Jacob's voice lowered. â€Å"When I changed, it was the most horrible, the most terrifying thing I've ever been throughworse than anything I could have imagined. But I wasn't alonethere were the voices there, in my head, telling me what had happened and what I had to do. That kept me from losing my mind, I think. But Sam† He shook his head. â€Å"Sam had no help.† This was going to take some adjusting. When Jacob explained it like that, it was hard not to feel compassion for Sam. I had to keep reminding myself that there was no reason to hate him anymore. â€Å"Will they be angry that I'm with you?† I asked. He made a face. â€Å"Probably.† â€Å"Maybe I shouldn't† â€Å"No, it's okay,† he assured me. â€Å"You know a ton of things that can help us. It's not like you're just some ignorant human. You're like a I don't know, spy or something. You've been behind enemy lines.† I frowned to myself. Was that what Jacob would want from me? Insider information to help them destroy their enemies? I wasn't a spy, though. I hadn't been collecting that kind of information. Already, his words made me feel like a traitor. But I wanted him to stop Victoria, didn't I? No. I did want Victoria to be stopped, preferably before she tortured me to death or ran into Charlie or killed another stranger. I just didn't want Jacob to be the one to stop her, or rather to try. I didn't want Jacob within a hundred miles of her. â€Å"Like the stuff about the mind-reading bloodsucker,† he continued, oblivious to my reverie. â€Å"That's the kind of thing we need to know about. That really sucks that those stories are true. It makes everything more complicated. Hey, do you think this Victoria can do anything special?† â€Å"I don't think so,† I hesitated, and then sighed. â€Å"He would have mentioned it.† â€Å"He? Oh, you mean Edwardoops, sorry. I forgot. You don't like to say his name. Or hear it.† I squeezed my midsection, trying to ignore the throbbing around the edges of my chest. â€Å"Not really, no.† â€Å"Sorry.† â€Å"How do you know me so well, Jacob? Sometimes it's like you can read my mind.† â€Å"Naw. I just pay attention.† We were on the little dirt road where Jacob had first taught me to ride the motorcycle. â€Å"This good?† I asked. â€Å"Sure, sure.† I pulled over and cut the engine. â€Å"You're still pretty unhappy, aren't you?† he murmured. I nodded, staring unseeingly into the gloomy forest. â€Å"Did you ever think that maybe you're better off?† I inhaled slowly, and then let my breath out. â€Å"No.† â€Å"‘Cause he wasn't the best† â€Å"Please, Jacob,† I interrupted, begging in a whisper. â€Å"Could we please not talk about this? I can't stand it.† â€Å"Okay.† He took a deep breath. â€Å"I'm sorry I said anything.† â€Å"Don't feel bad. If things were different, it would be nice to finally be able to talk to someone about it.† He nodded. â€Å"Yeah, I had a hard time keeping a secret from you for two weeks. It must be hell to not be able to talk to anyone.† â€Å"Hell,† I agreed. Jacob sucked in a sharp breath. â€Å"They're here. Let's go.† â€Å"Are you sure?† I asked while he popped his door open. â€Å"Maybe I shouldn't be here.† â€Å"They'll deal with it,† he said, and then he grinned. â€Å"Who's afraid of the big, bad wolf?† â€Å"Ha ha,† I said. But I got out of the truck, hurrying around the front end to stand close beside Jacob. I remembered only too clearly the giant monsters in the meadow. My hands were trembling like Jacob's had been before, but with fear rather than rage. Jake took my hand and squeezed it. â€Å"Here we go.†